The First Victim Of The Public Option

Dateline: Washington DC

Today, at 12:00 pm, ET, The American Way Of Life took her last breath. Dependent upon public healthcare for her survival, she had been on life support in recent years. Even so, it seemed, on more than one occasion, that she might rally and recover her strength. After all, she was a tough old bird. But, in the end, she succumbed to gross malpractice. She was 233 years old.

The American Way Of Life was born on this continent in 1776. It was a difficult birth. Really hard fought. Many of those who cheered her arrival gave their lives in the struggle. And she experienced some growing pains. Wars were fought to allow her to reach adulthood.

But, boy, was it ever worth it. She grew into a real beauty, with a visionary mind and healthy, vibrant systems. The envy of many, she carried a superpower within her. She embodied a culture rich in opportunity for individual achievement. She leveled the playing field so that initiative was rewarded and success was available to everyone. And, succeeding generations could accomplish even more than the ones that went before.

Our part was easy. We just had to practice self-reliance, accept individual responsibility, work hard and play fair. And, one other thing. We had to make sure our public caretakers kept her healthy, which meant staying out of her way and letting her systems function. For a while, we replaced those charged with her care whenever their tinkering made her ill.

As the decades passed, the life she breathed grew better and better. And we prospered. Maybe too much, because, in the end, The American Way Of Life fell victim to our increasing complacency. Blinded by so much good fortune, we eventually lost sight of its source. We allowed the unqualified, the arrogant and the power-hungry to take over her care.

And those quacks really did a number on her. They put her into a deep depression and then prescribed hefty doses of entitlements, deficit spending, soaring taxes and suffocating regulations. These poisons shut down her organs and paralyzed her central nervous system.

As a final indignity, they amputated what was left of her capitalism and began grafting socialism in its place. By the time of her death, she was hardly recognizable.

Her caretakers deny accusations of malpractice, of course, insisting that she was diseased from birth or that her time was over. But, history will record her passing as the first casualty of the public option.
Funeral services are pending and are expected to go unnoticed by most Americans.

See you on the left-side.